In the past, I have had dreams about being pregnant, when I was younger and was not ready. But since I have been pregnant (24 weeks now/6 months), and more so recently, I have had dreams about the baby. For now, in the majority of my dreams the baby is a girl. I think I have only had one or two when it was a little boy. I know that probably does not determine the actuality of the gender, but I find it a little interesting.
In the most recent dream of Baby Bear, she was a girl and so beautiful. So beautiful that I was amazed and mesmerized. I kept looking at her eyes, which were a combination of John’s and my eyes. Very very blue, with a touch of light gray in them. As if the whole world were in her big round eyes. In the dream, I kept nursing her, switching from side to side. And she was doing very well! My family and extended family was also in this dream, telling me to give the baby carrots haha. I know that they would never actually tell me to give the baby anything until the baby was ready, so obviously this is a very dream like state. Anyway they were telling me that it is okay to give the baby certain things, and when I would strongly say no, they would roll their eyes and say I was crazy.
I say now and probably will continue to believe that I will raise the child vegetarian, as best as I can (with John’s approval). When in all honesty, as a baby they need nothing more than breast milk or formula if breast milk isn’t happening. But once they start to eat solid foods, you start with something soft like Cheerios or puffs or mashed up vegetables or fruit, nothing like meat or raw carrots. So in this dream, one thing after another kept happening, and I would have to fight for the baby. Maybe it’s the Mama Bear in me already feeling super protective. There would be some younger family members, I don’t even know who they actually were supposed to be, but I know that they were younger running around with the baby. The baby was probably 2 or 3 weeks old, and I flipped out, ran over, and snatched my baby back. I told him that was unacceptable no matter how over-protective I seemed, that running around with a tiny baby was not okay with me at all.
I don’t know why this dream was so long and so detailed, but I felt like I had to stand up for my baby and really truly protect them.
Not too long ago, I noticed how scared I was of other people holding my baby. Still being in the second trimester, I should have plenty of time to worry about things like that. But for some reason I began to feel anxious about people holding the baby, or something happening that I was not prepared for. So maybe that is where this dream came from, my anxieties dealing with other people wanting to love on little baby. But even as I write this, I realize I do not care how crazy, irrational, or overprotective people may think I am. I will do what is best, in my opinion, to protect and love my baby the most that I possibly can. Even if other people judge me or do not agree with the way that I am choosing to raise my child, that is their issue, not mine.
There are less than four months to keep the baby safe in my womb, and for that time, I am grateful.